Fat Biscuit

Thundering

Owen is playing at my feet while I write. He is pushing cars around and making lots of explosion sounds, even though he is 5 years old not 2. I have been getting stress headaches this week. I guess when you are a lazy unmotivated gal like me, even a little work makes you stressed out. Imagine if I went to an office every day. I'd have a breakdown. 

We leave for a week-long stay at Ocean City on Saturday. Before then I have what seems like an overwhelming list of jobs to complete. Behold the intense, nonstop circus that is my life:

1. Finish editing work before Saturday morning. It's not due until Monday, but I can't guarantee I'll have internet access at the condo.

2. Make a list of all food supplies needed for beach, including snacks, lunch food, and a few dinners.

3. Purchase all items on aforementioned list.

4. Pack bag with minimal amount of clothing. I always overpack.

5. Sleep and consume at least one cold beer.

Ok, so maybe that's not so bad, but it's hard to get anything done when O is asking me to help him build Bionicles every 10 minutes. 

Homeowners

We've just finished our alfresco dinner and are buying some time before starting Owen's bedtime routine (read: performance). Taylor put on the Gavin Friday version of Peter and the Wolf and is forcing O to listen to it. The music is dark and will guarantee that Owen never plays oboe in the school band. 

On Saturday we donned our ridiculous pseudo-gear and had a go at gardening. I wish I had taken a picture of Tay wearing a Crate and Barrel floral-patterned cloth napkin as a bandana. (He even had it clasped with a chip clip.) We purchased a hedge trimmer to attack the miles of vines that have attached to our back and side fences. Taylor got rid of about a third of it. He also managed to "trim" two extension cords in the process, necessitating multiple trips to the devil's store (Lowes). My job (because it seemed easier than using electrical equipment) was to rake and weed the border along the back of our house. I pulled out the ivy with my bare hands. I got really sweaty and dirty. It was quite moving. We have much left to do, but next weekend we'll be at the beach, so welcome back weeds!

Saturday night we went to play in Amy and Scott's pool. They live in a swanky apartment building right in Old Town, and one of its amenities is a pool complete with recently imported Kazakhstani lifeguard. We brought some pool toys with us. I only wish that Owen hadn't thrown one of these at Scott's chest. We're never getting invited back. 

After swimming we went up to Amy's apartment and had a yummy meal. Owen ate peanut butter on whole wheat pita bread. Sad. We talked about Amy and Scott's upcoming wedding, Obama, and sleazy singles' bars. O sat nicely on the sofa and played with his new Lego set from Rachael. 

Tomorrow I take Owen for his 5-year checkup. I know he'll get a shot or two, but I have promised ice cream afterwards, more for me than him really. 

Coffee, I Love You

Well, we're up. Not terribly early but considering Owen didn't go to bed until about 10 pm, it feels like we should still be sleeping. That's the thing when hubby doesn't get home from work until 9:30 (not normal, btw, just a busy day); everyone has a really long day and gets tired doing the things they are waiting to get a break from. Taylor was needing to hang out with Owen, and I was needing some fresh troops and some time alone in the kitchen. It was a long day. 

Owen just turned off the tube and requested an audiobook: A to Z Mysteries. 

Yesterday O and I mostly did errands. 

1. Dropped off recycling. This barely merits enumeration.

2. Turned in reading list at local library to receive summer coupon booklet. The librarian was exuberant and praised Owen extensively for his accomplishment. Owen just stared at her like she was crazy and lowered his head. He can't handle that much attention.

3. Drove all the way to Springfield Barnes and Noble to use our free-book coupon. Unfortunately, the B&N close to home was not redeeming these coupons. O and I browsed at books in the kid section, picked out the free book he wanted, and then had coffee and cake in the cafe. 

4. Bought groceries at Shoppers Warehouse. This does count as a major errrand as anyone with kids will understand. I managed to spend $90, which is way more than I usually pay. 

5. Picked up Tay's dry cleaning. Not difficult, but by this time, I was amazed at how nicely O went along with this errand. He brought a Tintin comic in with him to look at while we waited the 30 secs it took for the lady to retrieve our clothes.

Today we are heading to the Pirates Cove with some friends from preschool. I'm a bit nervous about being in public in a bathing suit (it always stresses me out), but I know O will have fun. Pray for me. 

Photos From NYC

courtesy of Alert Elf.

Gay Pride, Part 3

Day 3 in NYC turned out to also be the day of the Gay Pride Parade. We knew something was up that morning while we ate our breakfast at the nearby diner; from the diner window we watched police vans, metal fence barricades, and orange cones being unloaded. Taylor thought maybe a film crew would later arrive and shoot somebody walking along the street. When we saw lots of young, rainbow-clad people begin to congregate we correctly assumed it was a parade. Yeah for us! We go to NYC and get to see a fun parade. 

We didn't camp out on the sidewalk to watch--we had too much to fit in before our bus departed at 3 pm--but we did get to check things out during our walk to MOMA. At MOMA we got in for a cool $5 because we are members. We checked our bags and walked upstairs, where we hit the motherload: Olafur Eliasson's Ventilator installation.  Owen ran around below this swinging electric fan for ages. Other children joined him, and Taylor got to take lots of good photos. We are dorks. 

We wandered into a couple other rooms; one exhibit in particular was mostly conceptual art from the 1970s. Some was more recent, like a television that played a video loop of the artist Sigalat Landau spinning a barbed wire hula hoop around her naked body (Barbed Hula, 2000). Hmmm. Will Owen recover from that image? He didn't say much; kid's already desensitized from Batman cartoons, I guess.

As we walked to meet our Bolt Bus back to DC, we had to ask the cops to escort us across the blocked off street. We were almost IN the parade! Then there was another rainstorm, and we got soaked. I spent 4 hours on the bus with wet feet. Other than that, it was a perfect weekend.

Gay Pride, Part 2

At the American Museum of Natural History, we skirted the boundaries of the main exhibit area to avoid paying the "suggested" entrance fees. Within this safe zone, Taylor was able to study the new photographs by Michael Light and has vowed since our return to buy the catalog. I told him that as soon as the new Michael Light book arrives in the mail, he will have to recycle the 3-foot-high pile of magazines that is taking up valuable space in our tiny Cape Cod. (I'm going to insist on this; there is no need to keep every magazine. Life is too short. Read that shit. Recycle it. Move on.)

We left this museum and returned to Central Park. Owen sat and watched a pick-up soccer game. Then we watched the crazy skate dancing, which apparently takes place every weekend. Owen was loving that scene. Now he wants roller blades. 

Another rainstorm hit just as we reached Heckscher playground. We got soaked before it occurred to us to hide inside one of the stone play forts. We have some good pictures of this, with us all dripping wet inside the fort and crouched down in awkward knee-ripping positions, but Tay has yet to upload. A couple of young Russian tourists sought shelter with us. Couldn't understand a word they said, but I'm guessing it was something like, "What a charming American family. That boy is gorgeous, and his mother is a goddess, is she not Boris?"

Owen's First Gay Pride Parade

We're back from New York, and Owen survived. Or rather, Taylor and I survived without having to suffer too much whining from our 5-year-old suburban child who doesn't like walking. Owen did better than we thought, walking dozens of blocks each day and "humping" his own backpack. 

We traveled up to NYC early Friday on the Bolt Bus, an affordable and pleasant journey, which I highly recommend. Going by train has its advantages--the cafe car, the fold-down tables--but I think we'll be taking the bus from now on and using the cash we save on better things, like an extra night in the hotel or an extra dinner out. The bus was comfy, odor-free, and equipped with outlets and wi-fi.  You can't ask for more.

When we arrived near Madison Square Garden that afternoon, we still had several hours before check-in time. We schlepped to the hotel first anyway, to stow our one piece of luggage. Since we last stayed at the Gershwin Hotel, it had changed a bit; now large horn-like sculptures made from fiberglass and wire decorate its front. The quirky furniture is still there, and Owen loved to hang out in the back lounge and dance under the disco ball. We left the Gershwin and walked to FAO Schwartz, stopping once at the Disney store so that Owen could use their restroom. I was glad that he didn't want to browse; I can only take so much Disney. At FAO we quickly made our way to the top level where all the good stuff lives, like Legos and PlayMobil. 

From FAO we walked to Heckscher Park in Central Park, where we had such a good time last year. Cleverly, Taylor had this time brought Owen's swimming trunks so that he could enjoy a good splash in the water without being doomed to a soggy walk back to the hotel. My favourite moment at Heckscher was when Owen stripped down to get into his trunks and we discovered that that morning Owen had put his clean underwear over his dirty ones. The kid had been wearing two pairs of underpants all day. No, wait, my absolute favourite moment at Heckscher was when I spotted Ally Sheedy, and Taylor dashed back like a giddy schoolboy to catch a glimpse of her. (It turns out that he had a huge crush on her around the time she was scratching dandruff from her scalp.) 

Day Two in New York marked my Day One, meaning my period started that morning. Major drag to be bloated and a bit crampy on holiday. But you know me, . . . stiff upper lip. We took the subway to the Children's Museum of Manhattan. Owen's favourite exhibit was the one on Greek Gods and Goddesses, where you could play in a Trojan Horse and pretend to be Odysseus making his way home after the battle. Taylor and I, however, preferred the fascinating video of a tiny camera travelling down through some poor bastard's GI tract. Owen flinched and turned away from this exhibit. We were on our way back to Central Park when we were caught in our first of three rainstorms. We walked briskly instead to the nearby American Museum of Natural History.

to be continued . . . 

A Bag for Every Outing

When you can find the excuse to buy a new bag, you should. We're going to New York this weekend, and look what I got. I almost bought one at REI that was cheaper; however, it was a one-size deal and seemed to be creeping up my back as I wore it. This women's pack feels better. I think Taylor's a little jealous because he'll be using an "old" backpack from last season. I also bought Owen a First Aid pouch and said that he could be in charge of it during our trip. Then when he opened it up, I noticed all the medicaments and tweezers and ultrasharp scissors. Poor judgment on my part.